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dirty joke:
Three women were sitting around drinking and talking about their love lives.
One woman said, "I call my husband the dentist. Nobody can drill like he does."
The second woman giggled and confessed, "I call my husband the miner because of his incredible shaft."
The third woman quietly sipped her whiskey until her friend asked, "Say, what do you call your husband?"
She frowned and said, "The postman."
"Why the postman?"
"Because he always delivers late, and half the time it's in the wrong box."
What's the difference between Bill Clinton and JFK?
One of them was blown away in the back of a limo, the other was shot to death.
Excerpt from Kenneth Starr's cross examination of President Clinton.
Starr: Now you told us earlier that you spent a lot of money on a face lift for Ms. Lewinski. Would you like to clarify just how much money you spent?
Clinton: No, no ,no. What I said was, "I blew a wad on her face."
A rather well proportioned young lady, Joan, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of the hotel.
She wore a bathing suit the first day but, on the second, being a naturist, she decided that no one could see her way up there, and she slipped out of it for an overall tan.
She'd hardly begun when she heard someone running up the stairs. She was lying on her stomach, so she just pulled a towel over her rear.
"Excuse me, miss," said the flustered little assistant manager of the hotel, out of breath from running up the stairs.
"The hotel doesn't mind you sunbathing on the roof but we would very much appreciate you wearing a bathing suit as you did yesterday."
"What difference does it make," Joan asked rather calmly.
"No one can see me up here, and besides, I'm covered with a towel."
"Not exactly," said the embarrassed little man. "You're lying on the dining room skylight."